“I always look for price returns rather than income, because I make enough f——— money out of this sue shop—my law office.”
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(published in Men’s Health)
- Pack Your Bags: Any guy who can plan a trip to an exotic locale, such as Mongolia, Mozambique, or Papua New Guinea, would impress me.
- Buy Me a New Atlas and Globe: You could unlock my heart by allowing me to dream up my next trip. I love to travel, and hope to eventually set foot in 100 countries. I have many more to go.
- Do Something Special for My Parents: Family is important to me, so round-trip business-class tickets to Australia and New Zealand for my parents would earn you big points in my book.
- Relax Me: Yoga keeps me calm, so I’d be impressed if you thought to send a yoga instructor to my apartment for private sessions.
- Help Me Work Out: Finding an exercise bike at my door would be great for rainy days when my Raleigh M80 mountain bike and I are stuck indoors.
- Edify Me: Reading is a passion of mine, so a gathering with a couple of my favorite authors, especially Jared Diamond (Guns, Germs, and Steel) and Robin McKinley (The Blue Sword) would make for an exceptional evening.
- Please My Palate: Hiring a personal chef to prepare meals for the few nights a week I am home would be unforgettable.
- Send Me Packing: A man who recognizes the importance of my time with the girls is a keeper. A long weekend spa getaway for my sisters and me would be perfection.
She’s talking money, honey.
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Thought I would follow-up with my July 21st post on Danielle Chiesi. Today, she will be checking-in to a federal prison for a 30-month stay. Here’s some “insider info” from Dealbreaker:
This afternoon, Danielle Chiesi will report to a West Virginia prison for a 30-month stay, for her role in the Galleon insider trading case, wherein she passed valuable tips on to Raj Rajaratnam after the tech execs she worked closely with passed her a few of their own. Chiesi will be bunking at Federal Prison Camp Alderson (former home of Martha Stewart, where “women hide sugar packets and crackers in their socks and conceal larger items like eggs under their shirts”), and whileBloomberg reports that the former beauty queen/Newscastle analyst won’t be living alongside‘sadistic crack-selling lesbian rapists‘ (“It’s more college campus than Chained Heat, the 1983 exploitation film about women in jail” we’re assured), there may still be a few aspects of prison life about which D-Chi (“they give each other nicknames,” says one former resident) will be less than thrilled. Such as:
The no cleave or red fishnets rule.
Chiesi, a former teenage beauty queen who would show up at technology conferences wearing form-fitting clothes and low-cut tops, will have to make do with a uniform of khaki pants and shirt and steel-toe boots during her stay. The only other clothes allowed — pajamas, sneakers and athletic clothes like sweatshirts, shorts and t-shirts — can be bought in the commissary.
The godawful tan lines.
Prisoners are required to wear bras and underwear except when sleeping or showering. They can sunbathe on the lawn during their leisure time, but must wear mid-thigh length shorts and cannot apply tanning lotion to one another. They can’t roll up sleeves of their t-shirts.
The carbs.
The meals, primarily chicken-based, are heavy on the starch and light on the vegetables.
The fact that she may very likely suffer a beat down on weekend one as a result of striking up an innocent conversation with the wrong gal.
Conjugal visits are prohibited…[and] touching among inmates is not allowed, though Myers and the other former inmate say that sexual relationships do take place. Most of the fights that the unnamed prisoner saw were caused by jealous friends or lovers, including one incident when an inmate threw hot coffee at another woman.
Having said that, there are some pluses to this working vacation, like the aforementioned opportunity for a street name, as well as the chance to try her hand at a new line of work.
Inmates can also apply for limited spots in vocational classes where they can be trained as welders, electricians or cosmetologists — the most sought-after option.
So, not all bad.
(via Dealbreaker)
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Pinoe’s impression of Abby Wambach. Laff @mPinoe Megan Dennis-the-Menace Rapinoe (via fuckyeahmpinoe)
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http://blogs.thescore.com/tbj/2011/05/27/the-lebron-james-headband-timeline/
A very scientific examination of LeBron James’ rising headband… aka his receding hairline.
Year: 2003
Exposed forehead height: 3/4 inch
Estimated headband angle, relative to eyebrows: 5 degrees
Year: 2004
Exposed forehead height: 1.5 inches
Estimated headband angle, relative to eyebrows: 12 degrees
Year: 2005
Exposed forehead height: 1.6 inches
Estimated headband angle, relative to eyebrows: 12 degrees
Year: 2006
Exposed forehead height: 2.5 inches
Estimated headband angle, relative to eyebrows: 27 degrees
Year: 2007
Exposed forehead height: 2.25 inches
Estimated headband angle, relative to eyebrows: 24 degrees
Year: 2008
Exposed forehead height: 3 inches
Estimated headband angle, relative to eyebrows: 34 degrees (in honor of Paul Pierce)
Year: 2009
Exposed forehead height: 3.2 inches
Estimated headband angle, relative to eyebrows: 37 degrees
Year: 2010
Exposed forehead height: 3.48 inches
Estimated headband angle, relative to eyebrows: 39 degrees
Year: 2011 (via Jose3030)
Exposed forehead height: 4.22 inches
Estimated headband angle, relative to eyebrows: 47 degrees
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I am extremely saddened by this… Mark & Erin are the best part of my morning. L8 Erin… CNN kinda sucks.
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Norm MacDonald and Blake Griffin team up for laffs
(via Ball Don’t Lie)
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A good briefing on the effect new Chinese labor regulations are having on HK factories across the border. BUT what I found most interesting was this little bit of data:
[…] the average woman in the US and Europe will own six bras and eight pairs of underpants and buy two bras and five pairs of underpants a year.
In Japan, the average young woman buys 30 bras and 65 pairs of underpants a year.
wtf do Japanese women do with all that underwear…
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Today’s SOTS Street Poll. After all, the latest census figures determined that 100% of all divorces begin with marriage lol.
HVD to my lover, @timshaw <3 bffl: boyfriendforlife
